July 9th 2017 made it our First Year Anniversary! We made it our first year. You know when people say that the first year is the worst. For us it wasn't the worst! I wouldn't describe it like it's the most terrible thing ever. What do you expect when 2 different people are coming together trying to become unified. I have never grown so much in my life. I've grown so much as an individual and as A wife already. The biggest thing that My husband and I have learned in this first year is COMMUNICATION. I never understood how much talking helps lol. Being able to express yourself. Being able to understand what your hearing. Understanding your spouse enough to know how they prefer to be talked to. There's a lot that comes with communication. But thankfully because Marc and I was in a long distance relationship we had a lot of time to communicate. Communication was how we grew our relationship because we couldn't see each other that often. Personally for me I didn't know how to communicate effectively until I met Marc. Marc knows how to communicate in a effective way. So he has taught me a lot when it comes to communication. It went from me taking almost a hour to explain how I feel now it only takes me about 5 min. I've been learning how to deliver certain things and the approach I use. I have never seen a Man be respected when it comes to communication. So i'm blessed that my husband was patient enough to help me in that area. And forgive me when ever I wasn't effective when talking with him.
Next thing we both have learned to do is COMPROMISE. Because we are 2 different people living in the same household. Also coming from different households. We understood that compromising is a must. When we first got married we had to figure out what we did have to compromise. Our first year anniversary just passed so now we have a hang of it. But I remember when I would wake up in the morning and he would have the tv on working on his laptop while listening to music. I don't like noise when I'm first waking up. I like it to be quiet in the morning. Or at least just one thing playing at a time. So we had to talk about what we were going to do. So what we decided is that he can just plug his head phones in, and I can still have my quiet morning. But simple things like that could turn into arguments if you don't compromise when married. And so we are constantly perfecting compromising as we learn other new things about each other.
Last thing I will tell you guys about what we have learned is ADJUSTING. Being able to adjust to changes. Or just being able to adjust to anything. I'm the type a person that don't like surprises but lately I have gotten use to them because there will always be something and I need to be okay with that. I Relocated and moved here to Indiana from Detroit. So with that big transition I had to adjust. I had to adjust with being a wife as a whole. Adjusting to things that don't operate the way they use to when I was single. I can say that we both have gotten better. This marriage have grown my Husband and I so much, and it's only been for the better. With every hiccup it's just preparing us how to handle the next situation with wisdom. Which takes a lot of patience. But I think we have done pretty good our first year with combining two cultures. I give a lot of credit to my in-laws because they did a awesome Job raising a Husband and a responsible man. I'm thankful for all of the growth that has taken place in just one year. I'm excited to see what's next for the Bessiakes. With every trial and season I know that God will continue to be the foundation of this Marriage.
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